Reduce the Lies Your Teen is Telling You

Posted on by Dr. Mark Parisi

Oh the teenage years. There is nothing harder than trying to make sure you are raising a good teen and feeling like you are constantly being lied to. All teens lie. Teens typically lie to their parents about drug and alcohol use, where they are going, who and whether they are dating, who they are with, money, and their friends. Lying becomes a serious issue when the lies are consistent and more than a little white lie to avoid hurting someone.

Here are some suggestions from Dr. Parisi, a low cost psychiatrist in Chicago.

Chicago counselor

  1. Build a sincere connection with your teen. Being able to have a real conversation with your teen can be hard, but open communication is one of the best ways to keep your teen talking to you. Remember what teenagers do and think about. You are going to have to be able to handle some uncomfortable topics in order to be a reliable source for your teen. Be prepared to talk about anything…and you may not like what they are going to say, but you have to react rationally or your teen will not continue to talk to you.
  2. Model the truth. If you aren’t willing to be honest with your teen, they are likely to return the favor. This starts when they are young and can be little things you don’t likely think about. How often are you telling them everything is fine, when you really are stressed or worried about something at work. Children develop a baseline of acceptable lies or half-truths by watching how your react to situations in your life.
  3. Do not be an angry interrogator. Having moments you teen angers you is an avoidable part of parenting. But don’t use these moments to drill them with questions. You aren’t going to get any real answers. Make sure you are calm and really ready to talk with them if you want them to be honest with you. Remember to be prepared for answers you don’t likely want if you get them telling you the truth. Your reaction is important.
  4. Deal with lying as a separate issue. No matter what your child was lying to cover up, there are two separate issues. What he or she did and the lying about it. Make sure the lie is addressed as a problem of its own.
  5. Make your kids think. Putting responsibility on them is hard. As parents, we want to make everything easy in life for them.  Sometimes when teens have to accept responsibility it is the best way for them to learn the true lesson.

Raising kids is hard work. You have to set the boundaries and let your teen test them. This is how children learn to fail. Sometimes it is best they learn the hard way so they can succeed later.

If lying is consistently a problem with your teen, you need to seek mental health services in Chicago for your teen. Our affordable psychologist can help.

Anatomy of the 6 Basic Emotions

Posted on by Dr. Mark Parisi

Many people may be expressing themselves with an icon these days, but we all have them…EMOTIONS. Happyface, sadface, and so on. Although the icons are endless, there are only six basic emotions recognized by counselors and psychotherapists in Chicago.

Psychologists believe that there are a few universal emotions that are understood by people regardless of their background or culture. These emotions are easily recognized and interpreted through specific facial expressions. Although the basics are all the same, the emotion itself can be highly subjective. This means that we have broad labels for happiness, sadness, fear, anger, surprise and disgust, but how we each experience these feelings will be unique. Think of it this way. What bring you to the point of anger is not the same as someone else. Also, sometimes you are just mildly annoyed and sometimes you are in full-blown “Hulk” mode. This can be a wide range that would all fall under the same basic emotion of anger.

Let’s take a quick look at the basic anatomy of each emotion as a psychologist sees it.

Happiness: When a person is happy, muscles around the outside of eyes are tight (producing wrinkles or crow’s feet at the edge of eye), cheeks are raised, and corners or mouth are raised diagonally.

Sadness: When a person is sad, the inner corners of eyebrows are raised, eyelids are loose, and the corner of mouth is pulled down (frown).

Fear: When a person is in fear, eyebrows pull up and together, eyelids pull up, and their mouth stretches wide.

Anger: When a person is angry, their eyebrows will pull down, eyelids pull up, sides of lips roll in, and lips tighten.

Surprise: When a person is surprised, their entire eyebrows pull up, eyelids are pulled up, and mouth is open.

Disgust: When a person is disgusted, eyebrows pull down, the nose wrinkles, upper lip pulls up, and lips are loose.

Do you have trouble dealing with your emotions? Any of our affordable psychologists in Chicago and the surrounding area (Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, and Wilmette) would be happy to help you explore your needs further.

5 Ways to Build Your Mental Muscle

Posted on by Dr. Mark Parisi

We all hear how important it is to stay fit and healthy. You go to the gym, run, do crunches, but are you doing anything to challenge your mental muscle? It always surprises me how health and fitness take a focus, but the brain is left on the back burner. The brain needs exercise to keep functioning at its best. Here are a few tips to make sure your mind is also looking good.

  1. Get some brain food. You know that eating right is good for your body, but did you know it is good for your brain too! Foods that are high in Omega-3 fatty acids (fatty fish and grass-fed animals) are instrumental in allowing your brain membranes to remain fluid and allow signals to easily pass. You also must eat enough food every day. If you are starving your body, you are also starving your mind. You also need to avoid some foods. There are studies showing that foods that are high in cholesterol are linked to brain diseases. Too much sugar and fat effect the brain as well as rest of the body. Eat brain food to make sure your memory and cognitive ability are functioning at their best.
  2. Challenge your brain. People are running on routine. They get up, do the same job, see the same people, and relax in the same ways. This may be comforting to them, but they are not stimulating the brain. Try something new! When you mind is doing something it doesn’t know how to do, it is building synapse. It can be simple such as crosswords, Sudoku, or other brain games or something even more challenging such as learning a new language or craft. To build new synapses you bust work your brain in ways that it has never worked before. Think of it like this, going to the gym and doing the same exercise will eventually quit producing results, so you must switch things up to keep your body (AND MIND) gaining progress.
  3. Remember? How often are you forgetting things? Do you try to purposely remember something? Your memory is a use it or lose it muscle. If you haven’t been challenging your brain or switching things up, it is likely that you haven’t been forced to remember much knew knowledge. You are probably doing your same routine, and don’t need to remember anything. Start small by trying to remember the details of a favorite day or event and then build up to trying to remember entire conversations. Can’t remember what you did yesterday? Start journaling your daily activities and review them in the morning. Get your memory working and challenge it each day.
  4. Focus! Do you notice that you can’t concentrate like you used to? This is another cognitive process that must be practiced and put to use. One of the best things to do to help keep your focus is to learn what is distracting your. If there is something else on your mind, you probably need to address it first. You will also need to practice concentrating to get better at it. You have to force yourself to stay on a topic of a certain length of time, and then give yourself a break to think of other things. This is more difficult than it sounds.
  5. Relax and sleep. This one sounds super simple and a no-brainer, but most people do not get enough sleep and do not take time to relax their bodies and brains with something they enjoy. Your mind needs a break as much as your body. REM sleep is critical for your brain to retain information and maintain cognitive function.

If you would like more tips building your mental muscle or need an affordable psychologist or psychiatrist, contact Dr. Parisi in the Chicago and surrounding areas including Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, and Wilmette

Why it is Important to Offer Help in Many Different Languages

Posted on by Dr. Mark Parisi

English, Polish, Russian, Tagalog (Filipino), Spanish, Hindi, Gujarati, Urdu, and Arabic Spoken and Understood Here

No matter your culture or background we all need a little help sometimes. If you are seeking a low cost therapist in the Chicago and neighboring area, we know you have many choices and we appreciate you seeking the best fit for you. It has come to our attention that many of our clients were unaware of the language services that are available to them. Not only does Dr. Parisi and Associates offer affordable counseling in Chicago and surrounding areas of Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, and Wilmette, we also have psychologists who most likely have speaks your native language to better meet your needs.

We have a wide array of services, including psychotherapy treatments for ADHD, anxiety, depression, eating disorders, addictions, bipolar disorder, psychosis, OCD, and couple counseling and family problems. If you are seeking any mental health services including, a marriage and family therapist, a psychiatrist, a psychologist, a play therapist, a psychotherapist, a counselor or counselling, please contact us to help us find a program that best fits your needs to help you be your best. We are dedicated to the mental, emotional, and behavioral health of children, adolescents, adults, geriatrics, and families in and near Chicago.

 

 

Quick Facts About Disruptive Behavior Disorders

Posted on by Dr. Mark Parisi

All children sometimes break the rules. The difference between disruptive behavior disorder (DBD) and a kid just being a kid is the severity and frequency that these disruptive behaviors occur. A DBD is diagnosed from a persistent pattern of angry outbursts, arguments, and disobedience.

Children and teens with a DBD struggle with symptoms that interfere with their daily lives. This usually leads to them having conflicts with parents, teachers, authority figures, and other children. With the proper help from a marriage and family therapist in Chicago children with DBDs can be very successful in school and life and maintain healthy relationships with family and friends, but they need a lot of support and tools to make this happen.

So your child was diagnosed with disruptive behavior disorder (DBD), now what? First, relax and learn a few facts.

What does this mean?

  •  * DBDs are the most common mental health disorder among children.
  •  * 4% to 9% of all children from birth to 18 years old will be diagnosed with a DBD.
  •  * Environmental factors can effect how the child functions.
  •  * DBD are disorders that are only identified in children and adolescence.

 

What should you expect in treatment?

  •  * Parenting modification strategies Social and emotional skills training for children
    •  – Communication skills
    •  – Parenting skills
    •  – Conflict resolution skills
    •  – Anger management skills
  • * Psychotherapy for the child and the family, such as one of our play therapists in Chicago
  •  * Teaming with a counselor in Chicago
  •  * If necessary, the addition of medication to the therapy plan

 

What can you do?Dr. Parisi chicago counselor

  •  * Find ways to maintain a positive relationship with your child.
  •  * Be consistent. Learn all you can about how to effectively manage your child’s behavior; find what works for you and stick to it.
  •  * Find parental support so you can handle your own emotions.
  •  * Get help!

* Try our affordable psychologists or psychiatrists in Chicago or one of our behavioral therapy specialists in Chicago and Mount  and the surrounding area including Mt. Prospect and Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, and Wilmette.

 

How the Media Impacts the Stigma of Mental Illness

Posted on by Dr. Mark Parisi

Frequently we hear stories of tragic situations around the nation, such as the recent one about a woman in Florida who drove her van full of children in to the ocean (http://www.cnn.com/2014/03/05/us/florida-mother-minivan-ocean/).  A big story such as this usually end with uncertainty of the individual’s mental stability or the individual was being sent for full evaluation, and that is the last the public hears about it. This leaves many people with a misconception about those dealing with a mental illness. Media followers are left with a brutal image and no education. The news is not the only media outlet that is guilty of building this type of stigma. Many movies and TV shows also provide wrong, incomplete, or misinformation about mental illnesses.

Media coverage of psychiatric issues will reflect or influence public perceptions of the mentally ill whether it is intentional or not, and these typically inaccurate depictions fuel the negative stigma. Because of the stigma related to these often violent and tragic stories, people who need help are often afraid to seek it due to the thought that they will be categorized with some of these tragic events.

There are many elements about mental illness that are inaccurately portrayed in the entertainment industry. One of the most common misconceptions is that the mentally ill are violent. The truth is mental illness is a poor predicator of violence or even a situation that would be news worthy (http://depts.washington.edu/mhreport/facts_violence.php). Unfortunately, because of the way that media has portrayed people who are impacted by a mental illness, this is a not commonly known among viewers.

Some of the other misconceptions about mental illness due to media influence include people with a mental illness are bad or evil in some way, that depression is easily treated with a magic pill, that they are unstable or unpredictable, or that mental illness is not something that can be cured. (http://psychcentral.com/lib/medias-damaging-depictions-of-mental-illness/0002220)

People can and will get better all the time, and most people who are dealing with a mental illness are typical people who get up and go to work every day like the rest of us. To get better, individuals need to not be afraid to seek out the supports and services that are necessary to provide hope and a belief that tomorrow can be a better day.

The media’s job is to entertain, not educate. My wish, is to put a more positive emphasis and greater accuracy of media coverage of mental health issues, but it is our job to be more conscious about what information we are taking in and seek further information.

For mental health services in Chicago, Dr. Parisi and staff are available to help those in the Chicago, Mt. Prospect, and surrounding areas of Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, and Wilmette. Don’t fall victim to the negative stigma. Believe that tomorrow can be better and we can provide the support you need.

What Should I Expect in Psychotherapy?

Posted on by Dr Mark Parisi

It’s normal to feel a little nervous or anxious when you first being psychotherapy. The first few sessions might even feel a little uncomfortable or awkward. It’s not necessarily easy to meet someone new for the first time and begin sharing your personal thoughts and feelings. But remember, as you continue in therapy you will feel more and more comfortable and at ease with discussing your issues. Your psychotherapist is specially trained and experienced in building rapport and helping you reach your goals. Every psychotherapist’s style and approach will vary, however there are some universal aspects to psychotherapy.

Throughout psychotherapy you will develop a trusting therapeutic relationship with your therapist. During this time you will have the opportunity to work on your challenges and to look deeply at your personal values and choices. Therapy is a collaborative process between you and your therapist. The more you are willing to invest yourself in this process the more impact it can have in your life. You and your therapist will explore your issues and problems through discussion. Some of your sessions may focus on your internal thought patterns, feelings, and body sensations in order to gain an understanding of different aspects of who you are and how you think. During your time in therapy you will learn to pay attention to your experiences without judgment in order to better understand how your mind works.

Your therapist may want to initially start off by gathering personal information and a history about your family, health, and education as well as administer some type of assessment or test. It is normal to begin therapy with an assessment as these tools help gather information and get an in depth understanding of your issue. The outcome of the assessment often assists the therapist in determining the best course of action for your treatment and will help guide your sessions.

Your psychotherapist will then help to clarify and educate you regarding the problem you are experiencing. After clarifying your problems, you will work together to find resolution to your issue. It is not uncommon for treatment to include other providers such as a psychiatrist. For example if you are receiving psychotherapy from a psychologist, they may refer you to a health care provider who can prescribe you medication if they believe you may benefit from it.

It is important to understand that therapy will be a challenging endeavor and often takes time and commitment. Therapy often leads to a deep personal understanding, and significant and long lasting change. You may find yourself thinking and behaving differently. In addition to this transformation you will learn new skills to help you cope with future issues and challenges.

Contact Dr. Parisi for low cost therapy in Chicago, Mt. Prospect, and surrounding areas including Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, Evanston, and Wilmette.

What Should I Expect During My First Visit to a Behavioral Health Clinic?

Posted on by Dr Mark Parisi

It is common that your provider ask that you to come in several minutes early to your first appointment in order to fill out the required paperwork. A typical session can last anywhere from 45-60 minutes long so plan accordingly. During the first session your therapist may also cover the logistics of therapy, such as confidentiality, scheduling, cancelation policies, and fees. Plan your payment in advance. Prior to your first session determine whether you will be paying out-of-pocket for your services or if you will be using your health insurance plan. Some private health insurance companies may cover mental health services such as psychotherapy, but others do not. Before you begin therapy you should check your policy to see what is covered and what provider accepts your coverage. Insurance companies vary in terms of services they cover and some mental health disorders are not covered at all. Double-check with your provider in advance in order to help you plan your payment.

Conduct your research a head of time and prepare a list of questions you might have for your provider. Be prepared to share information about yourself and the issues you would like to address. Your therapist most likely will begin by ask you a series of questions to help identify what problem you would like to work on. They may begin with a simple question such as, “What brings you here today?” Be as clear as possible regarding your goals and what you would like to accomplish during your time in therapy. It is not uncommon to begin therapy with some type of assessment. These assessments help gather information and guide the course of therapy. Prepare to discuss your health, education, culture, and family circumstances. During the information gathering process your provider may recommend further psychological testing or suggest a medical examination to rule out possible medical issues.

Once your provider gathers a full history, you will work together to develop a treatment plan and establish goals. This process is collaborative and your commitment and dedication is important. After several sessions you should have a clear understanding of your issue and your treatment plan. This plan should include your goals and how you will work towards accomplishing these goals.

Contact Dr. Parisi for low cost therapy in Chicago, Mt. Prospect, and surrounding areas including Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, Evanston, and Wilmette.

How Do I Know Which Type of Counseling or Style of Psychotherapy is Right for Me?

Posted on by Dr Mark Parisi

The type of psychotherapy or counseling that is best for you is largely dependent on your individual preferences and needs. There are certain techniques and approaches that are more helpful than others when dealing with specific types of problems and your therapist will be knowledgeable in those approaches. For example, panic disorder is typically treated with various forms of controlled exposure therapy as research suggests it is most effective in treatment. Arm yourself with knowledge and research about the best type of therapy pertaining to your issue. This can be helpful in narrowing down what type or style of counseling is best for you.

Psychotherapists typically use an evidence-based practice and approach towards treating psychological problems. Evidence-based practice is the integration of the best available research along with the mental health practitioner’s clinical expertise, in the context of the individual’s characteristics, culture, and preferences, (American Psychological Association, 2014). Therapists consider these factors when selecting the type of therapy for treatment. They use their knowledge in research regarding the appropriate techniques to use for a specific issue and determine what the best course of treatment is based on their past experiences treating other patients and integrate your personal preferences, character and values, (APA Policy Statement, 2005).

There are many different theoretical approaches to psychotherapy and practicing psychotherapists usually draw on one or more of these theoretical perspectives to help them understand their client’s problems. The theoretical perspective of your psychotherapist will affect what goes on in therapy. For example, therapists who utilize a cognitive-behavioral approach may assign you tasks to complete or ask that you practice a new skill outside of therapy. Where as a therapist who uses a psychoanalytic approach might focus on talking in depth about your past and present memories, thoughts, and emotions rather than doing specific tasks. Most therapists combine components from several different styles of psychotherapy and blend different approaches to tailor treatments to their clients needs.

The relationship you have with your therapist is an important one and evidence suggests that development of a good relationship between a therapist and client actually predict better outcomes in therapy. Integrated throughout therapy should be efforts from the therapist to establish a genuine, nonjudgmental, and trusting therapeutic relationship. The therapeutic relationship that is created between you and your therapist is a valuable one and this relationship can act as a catalyst to help facilitate change. After you have determined that your therapist is experienced, skilled, and knowledgeably, a good indicator of whether the type of counseling is right for you would be your comfort level working with your therapist. Most importantly, remember psychotherapy is a process. It takes time, commitment, and effort.

Contact Dr. Parisi for low cost therapy in Chicago, Mt. Prospect, and surrounding areas including Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, Evanston, and Wilmette.

How Do I Know Which Mental Health Professional Is Right for Me and How Do I Select the Right One?

Posted on by Dr Mark Parisi

More and more evidence has proven that psychotherapy can help with a wide range of psychological issues. Once you have decided that you would like assistance from a mental health professional it can be a little difficult to know which mental health professional is best for you. There are many options and factors to consider when making this decision and selecting the best choice.

First consider the problem you would like to solve. In order to identify the best form of treatment it is important to identify the problem first. A thorough evaluation and assessment is a necessary first step in identifying mental health related issues. These assessments are usually called mental status exams or diagnostic evaluations. These help your provider get a better understanding of what the problem is and how it is affecting you personally. Assessment tools can be helpful by gathering important information such as health history, family history, and education, along with other cultural and social factors. This information is important for mental health professionals to know in order to determine the best course of action.

Second, it is important to determine what the best course of treatment is for your identified problem. For some issues medication might be the best approach and for other issues psychotherapy or a combination of the two is highly recommended. It is all dependent on your specific needs. For example, if you need to work with someone who can prescribe medication, a psychiatrist may be a good mental health care provider for you. If you are having marital issues, a marriage and family therapist might be a good option as they can provide psychotherapy for couples. You might even work with both a psychiatrist and a therapists depending on the issue. It’s normal to have a treatment team when dealing with complex mental health and emotional issues. Typically a good indicator of a good match will include a mental health professional with experience treating other individuals who have experienced a similar issue. A good way to determine how much experience they have is simply by asking.

Regardless of which mental health care professional you initially see they will have knowledge of the treatment options that are available for you, as well as knowledge of your identified mental health condition. They can help educate you on your best options. The best option will most likely be different for each individual depending on his or her circumstances. Most mental health professionals can provide treatment for a wide range of issues and have had extensive training and experience in treating these issues. Ask your mental health care provider what their history or experience is in treating issues similar to the one you are experiencing.

Last, consider your finances, personal preferences, culture, values, and character. Mental health providers and clients work together and the right match is important. Once you have determined that the provider you are working with has the correct credentials, background, and competence, consider your level of personal comfort with the provider and their approach towards treatment. Establishing rapport and trust is a critical aspect of treatment. Choose someone who you feel comfortable and safe with.

Contact Dr. Parisi for low cost therapy in Chicago, Mt. Prospect, and surrounding areas including Des Plaines, Arlington Heights, Schaumburg, Barrington, Hinsdale, Skokie, Lincolnwood, Park Ridge, Evanston, and Wilmette.